I’m pleased to have Cara Bristol visiting us on the blog again today. Today she’s launched an interesting topic. I hope you’ll enjoy her post, join the conversation and leave your comments and opinions in the comments section.
Secrets
Some secrets don’t start out as such.
They can begin as a preference, a criticism, or a need that goes unexpressed.
The way he chews bothers you. You don’t like the way he acts when he’s with the guys. Her tuna casserole is not your favorite. You want more sex. You want less sex. You want a different kind of sex.
And the secret goes and goes, until months, or perhaps years, have passed and what was once little has grown to gigantic proportions. Because if it’s not a big deal, why wouldn’t you have spoken up? You can’t say anything now!
That’s the situation Morgan and Jack find themselves in in Secret Desires, my BVS story that is also available in the anthology Spanked! Ironically both of them are harboring the same secret – each wants a more adventurous sex life than what they’re having. Each in the past had been criticized by former lovers for their unbridled sexual behavior, so when they met, they each vowed to clean up their act.
But though they love each other, both now long for more sexual variety than they’re getting – but they’re afraid to speak up. Morgan tries. In her own way, she pushes Jack’s buttons to get his attention. All he knows is that is that she pushes his buttons.
Until the night of Morgan’s thirtieth birthday when she pushes Jack a little too far, and she gets a birthday spanking that releases a whole lot of secrets and a whole lot of desire.
What do you think about keeping secrets in marriage? A good idea or a bad one?
Cara writes such great posts.
I have little secrets I don’t share with hubby, but it’s stuff I know he’d rather not hear, like my mental-undressings of the occasional hot guy at the gym. Or how irritated I am at having to pick his socks off of every room in the house for the bazillionth time. That’s marriage…sometimes you have to know when to zip it.
When it comes to our intimate relationship, I tell him everything. Sharing my inner wishes doesn’t always get me what I want, but it makes the odds a lot better than saying nothing.
I agree with you both, Wilma and Mary. In some relationships one might need to shut up in order to keep the peace BECAUSE the partner is not open to new ideas…or is threatened by them.
I think too that people sometimes hold back and are less than fully honest because they don’t trust their partners to give them what they want. If they ask and are denied then they are stuck. If they don’t ask then hope lives on. I think this was kind of the case with Jack and Morgan in SECRET DESIRES, Cara.
I also believe that it is riskier to be honest (when what you want/feel/think is different from what your partner wants/feels/thinks) the more vested you are in a relationship. The more important the relationship is the more risk there is in being honest when wants, needs, feelings, and thoughts conflict.
It would depend on the partner’s ability to face new ideas.
Thank you, Mary. That’s a very honest comment.
I think some things are not exactly secrets, but a way of shutting up & keeping the peace. I feel total honesty is just looking for trouble.